AF 447

"[Catharsis] is the human soul that is purged of its excessive passions."--Aristotle

I think everybody is aware of the tragic accident that happened recently (May 31, 2009) when an Air France plane carrying 228 people from Brazil to France "vanished" over the Atlantic after flying into air turbulance . French President Sarchozy said that the chances of finding survivors were "very small". I think he meant "non -existent". 228 people. All dead. But see, it's not about 228 dead people; It's about 228 lives. It's about 228 lives colliding with ours. It's about 228 lives reminding us what we all have a tendency to forget; that the infernal machine is still running, that life is a temporary assignment and that we will not receive any notice of termination. It's about 228 lives reminding us that the human life can never be won for it is tragic and always ends in death which can never be avoided.

I have a passion for Ancient Greece; its history , its culture and society, its mythology, its Art and architecture; its playwrights and philosophers. Its wars. It is during that time that Tragedy as a form of Art was born in the Theatres of Athens about 2500 years ago . Tragedy is a drama typically describing a conflict between the protagonist and a superior force e.g God, destiny, fate etc and having a sorrowful or disastrous conclusion that presents pity or terror.
According to Aristotle, tragedy by presenting pity and fear, accomplishes a catharsis of those emotions; meaning a sudden emotional climax evoking feelings of profound sorrow, pity, laughter or any other extreme change in emotion, resulting in restoration, renewal and revitalization in members of the audience. In fact, catharsis is the Greek word for cleansing or purification.

...Where do I want to get to with all that?

Well, I had an epiphany. That accident made me realize that traveling has, in fact, become a way for me to experience catharsis, to seek relief from the tragedy of life and eventually reach inner peace.

Two years ago, I had a dream- or shall I say a nightmare. I was in a big plane with 3 or 4 other people. Suddenly, the plane flew into air turbulence and then dropped . Somehow, I got up and walked up to the cockpit. I don't remember all the details, all I know is i tried to do something, anything to stop the fall... but I could see through the window that the plane was going to crash. And there was that evil voice that kept saying "you are going to die, you are going to die.."

The following day, I was supposed to travel to Europe. I missed my flight and took the next one. At some point I fell asleep and when I woke up I heard a voice saying "you should have been dead ."

The plane I was supposed to take initially did not crash, but ever since that day, I have been having panic attacks whenever I am in a plane - especially during the take-off and landing phases. My hearts starts racing, I get extremely nervous, etc.. I have all those images of plane crashes in my head and I mentally prepare myself to die. *

Logically , I should have stopped traveling or I should avoid traveling when it 's not necessary. But it's far from being the case: I unrelentingly continue planning new trips with the same enthusiam as before that nightmare (I'm currently planning trips to Cuba, India and Australia for this coming fall !!). Why? I use to think that it was a way for me to defy life or death..or both of them. Or that maybe I uncounsciously was suicidal. Until that accident.

While watching the news, I obviously thought that I could have been one of those passengers, but instead, I was part of the 'lucky' audience watching the tragedy. I imagined that they must have experienced the same fears I experience during my panic attacks and then... ? And that's when I had my epiphany: I realized that once those panic attacks finally passed, I had found myself in a state of profound peace, with my mind and senses purified. I had accomplished a catharsis of my fears. My fear of death, my fear of never reaching my destination and to some extent my fear of failure.

Human Life indeed is a tragedy in which we are both the audience and the protagonist, the witness and the victim. But like any tragedy, Human Life is restful; for hope has no part in it. There is no hope. We are trapped.

All we can do is "Watch, keep alert, and pray; for [we] don't know when the time is." (Marc 13:33)

My Prayers go to the family of Laeticia, Aurélia, Michael, Arthur.. and that of the 224 other
passengers on board flight AF447.

* I now pray and use some breathing techniques to abort those panic attacks.